Editor’s note: This is a contribution to the Love Sparks Blogging Festival, hosted by the wonderful Jasmine Lamb.
Have you ever felt a sense of unity amongst all people, perhaps even all living things? A shared experience, interconnectedness? Universal love?
Like Adrienne from Experience Life Fully, I believe there’s an infinite stream of universal love you can tap into at any moment. It’s what connects us all together.
Every day I have a 15 minute walk home from the bus stop. On one of these walks, the sun and wind were impeccably bright and crisp, perfect for one of my first encounters with universal love. Taken by my wonderful surrounding, everyone passing by glowed with possibility. I emanated positive vibes, as much as I knew how. I tapped into the universal stream of love. I felt viscerally how connected each and every one of us really are – we are bound by our biology, our animal nature – our need to eat, drink, and love. We are emotionally volatile, each full of beauty, wonder, innocence, wisdom, and brimming with contradictions.
But I also feel something’s missing. A disconnect. I tapped into the universal stream of love, but could they feel it too? Did they know I was emanating warm wishes of love and well-being to them? Did they know that I want them to blossom making full use of their potential?
And so I’ve decided that I want to act on universal love. I want to become friends with my neighbors, and try to create a stronger sense of community. If disaster strikes, who will I band with if not my neighbors?
This is brave and bold new territory for me – I’m an awkward person most of the time, unless I really really trust you. In middle school it was difficult for me to say a simple Hi! or Hello back to someone. It was partly due to lack of self-confidence, and partly thanks to a strong fear of connection – I simply didn’t understand it at the time. Do we have a relationship now that we say ‘Hi’ to each other? Is that a friendship? What does it mean to ‘connect’? To be quite honest, it’s only recently that I’ve been able to really understand and recognize connection.
When it comes to the neighborhood folks, you guessed it, I get confused. Are my neighbors my friends? What about the local grocer? I see him at least once a week – do we ‘know’ each other now?
Empowerment arrived in the form of an epiphany: You can be anyone you want to be, do anything you want to do [so long as it doesn’t hurt others], and that’s okay. There is no need to conform. I knew that, but my anxious insecurity always took over.
Connecting with like-minded people has helped ease that whole oppressed world to the wayside. I see you, anxiety, but you are too far from me to bother me. There are people out there who understand me. I find them online, and at the farm. I am supported, nurtured, loved.
Self-love was born out of genuine connection. Confidence has the opportunity to blossom.
Thanks to you, it’s possible for me to be confident and say hello, without hesitation, to the lady who runs the liquor store downstairs. To express genuine interest in her day, and perhaps offer her a little something good out of all the bad that she might experience or see at her job.
She told me a story about a woman who came in and couldn’t find a job for 9 months. When she did, her new job was located all across the bay. She had to transfer on three buses to get to work. It was a little reminder of how privileged my life is – a solid day job and the opportunity to engage in meaningful connection and work.
I know now that if I want to make a difference, build community, and love universally, I will have to step up to the plate and find a way to express myself and embrace connection. After all, I’m not trying to save the environment for myself. It’s for everyone, all of you. It’s so plastic can stop poisoning the poor factory workers working round the clock to make more plastic, only so we can rip it to shreds and toss it. It’s so pesticides and debt [from dependency on pesticide and chemical fertilizer] can stop taking lives all over the world.
An older gentleman once said he could take the bus back when he was young, and he could always talk to at least a handful of people, guaranteed. Today? That’s a myth you’ll never see. People are stuck in their own minds, glued to their iPhone/iPad/laptop screens, pretending to be too busy or neurotic to have a simple chat with you about your day.
I don’t want to go with this flow. I want a community of earthly love. It’s time to show it.
Check out this TEDx talk by Van Jones, author of Green Collar Economy, which explains the intricate relationship between sustainability and social justice.
This is such a beautiful post that really resonates with me. I find it very easy to hide behind the comfort of the internet and have realised my ‘real life’ social circle is closing in on me. A friend also fired me up this week by suggesting we stop ‘preaching to the converted’ via our blogs and go out into the neighbourhood and spread our message in gently ways, just by connecting.
Some great thoughts in all of this for me. Best of luck with getting ‘out there’ yourself and I hope you make some great connections x
I’m so glad it resonates. I find it easy too to hide behind the Internet, preaching to the converted. I haven’t figured out how to talk about it to the non-converted [very scary if you ask me!], but that’s something I’m working on. Best of luck to you too!
I too am finding it easier to connect with others nowadays than when I was in school, probably because my self-confidence and my self-love have grown with time.
I like your description of walking and emanating positive vibes
Cristina – self-love can do wonders! I hope it only gets better for you
Lynn,
You writing is blossoming in the most incredible way. Simply stunning. I fully resonate with the sense of awkwardness you have felt as well as all the confusion about boundaries. I’m so glad you’ve found connection and love online and at the farm. You are a hero to be sweeping aside the anxiety and stepping up to the plate. I admire your courage. Me too: “I want a community of earthly love.”
Thanks so much, Sandra! I’m so glad there are others going through the same thing, helps me feel much less alone. Hero? *blush* you flatter me! Though I have to admit, moving past the anxiety and taking those first few steps forward? Feels pretty heroic. It’s something I’ll celebrate in my private time
fantastic to read this – I’m about to launch an experiment dedicated to this exact notion and I am thrilled to find your blog and meet you. Yes to this connection and sharing, a thousand times yes.
Jennifer – so glad you want to do the same. Will you be blogging about it? I’d love to hear your story.
launched last week at jenniferlouden.com !!
Dear Lynn,
I had goosebumps as I was reading this…I feel you every step of the way! I know exactly what you mean, what it’s like to feel so much love in your heart for everyone around you, and to wonder if that love and energy is really being exuded from you…to wonder if it’s really reaching others and making a difference. You know, I truly believe it does. In fact, I just finished writing a note on Facebook about an experience I just had as I was taking my dog for a jog. As we slowed to a walk, I was breathing heavy, feeling great, and looking down in admiration at my so cute, fuzzy, puppy. As I looked up, I met eyes with a mail lady inside her truck. It was the most amazing thing, because I saw my gigantic grin reflected in her face! Love really is contagious!
Like you said, though, the world requires more of us than our positive energy and intentions. It’s not enough to wish good thoughts for the world. If we really want to make a difference, we need to be out there making real connections…with people and the earth. As I mentioned in my email, I absolutely love everything you are doing and sharing. You inspire others to do and become more, and that is such a beautiful gift to give to the world.
Thank you so much for this!
~Much love, Adrienne
Adrienne, thanks so much for your kind words. I’m glad the post resonates with you! You’re right about the subtle effects of love. If nothing, at least I feel much better.
<3
Lynn-this post was beautiful. I could feel your deep sense of love for all through your words. I do believe that each person we come in contact with knows on some level that we are wishing them love and well-being. Keep smiling and emanating positive vibes and those real connections and earthly love will follow.
Thanks, Lori! I certainly hope real connections will follow
Between this post and Sandra’s latest, I feel like I’m being challenged to step it up — in the best of ways, of course. I’m terrible at connections, emotions, other squodgy things that can’t be filed neatly away into intellectual curiosities. I’m grateful to have stumbled on to a wonderfully supportive blog community, and I know that I need to be reaching out more than I do, not only on the net, but also in real life. Even if that means talking to people I don’t know. Eep.
Yea, I’ve always been terrible with connection. But meeting supportive, like-minded people has been tremendously helpful. They [you] make me feel less crazy and alone, and more confident overall. Talking to strangers can be really tough! Especially if I’m looking to be neighborly friends.
For me, I start small – put aside my personal issues as much as I can, and focus on showing genuine interest. Usually people will just start opening up to me, and it flows from there. I’ve mostly reached out to people living in my building and the lady in the liquor store. I also hang out with people at the garden, but it’s much easier to connect there than in ‘regular life’. I don’t know how to talk to people on buses, that’s for sure!
Start small, maybe just a smile [like Andrea suggested below]. Get comfortable with that, and then move on from there, at your own pace.
What a great tribute to love on Valentine’s day. This line resonated with me: “After all, I’m not trying to save the environment for myself. It’s for everyone, all of you.”
I have sat on the bus and wanted to talk to people as well, just to flex my connection muscle that I too, am trying to develop. It is hard though. Some are open, some are not. What do you say? Sometimes someone will start a conversation with me, sometimes I am too shy and just read my books…
When I am walking around in public, I also try to emit a feeling of love and light. Love and light people, love and light!! I think it gets to some people, I really do.
Thanks so much, Sherry! It is really tough to talk to people on the bus – I’m not starting there, that’s for sure!
I do find too that I can’t be connecting with everyone – if I show interest and others don’t, it can’t be forced. And I won’t necessarily want to connect with everyone either, but I’m at least more open to it now than before.
I would say start with emitting positive feelings, smile, if they smile back that’s probably a good sign they might be interested in chatting. I think it helps to use your subtle senses a little, and try to pick out people that would be interested in a friendly chat. Go for those. I expect not everyone wants to chat – talking with strangers these days is not so ‘normal’ unfortunately.
I think emitting light and love totally gets to people! It can be in the form of a smile, or just a general atmosphere.
What a lovely post!
I have a great tip for anyone out there who wants to spread warmth but may be too shy to strike up a conversation with a stranger: just smile at someone. My friend Kate does this as a daily ritual on her way to and from work, on a commuter train. She looks around until she can find someone who looks sad/distracted/stressed out, then smiles at them until they notice. They always smile back.
That’s a great tip, Andrea! Thanks for sharing. I’m definitely a little nervous smiling to strangers, especially downtrodden ones. But perhaps I’ll try it out when I’m comfortable, and see where it goes.
Lynn,
So glad you shared your walk home from the bus stop with us. Beautiful. Even better to hear you’re connecting with your neighbors! Small. Steps. Forward. Be well!
Thanks, Bill! Yes, I start with small steps. And I start with only a few people, and add more when I am comfortable.
A wonderful and inspirational post. Thank you. I am adding you to my bookmarks!
Hi Penny, thanks so much! I’m honored